There are a number of reasons why couples seek out Couples Therapy & Counseling. You may be considering getting married or contemplating divorce. There may be conflict in your relationship, distance and disconnection between the two of you, you may have difficulty communicating, you may be struggling with the challenging dynamics of a blended family. As a couples’ therapist I do not take sides or make decisions for you on how to proceed with the relationship. I do help with communication, helping each person to communicate his or her needs, thoughts, and emotions, and make sure that each person in the relationship listens to the other partner and also has the opportunity to be heard. Some of the common relationship concerns that occur with couples are financial difficulties or disagreements, difficulty communicating, frequent conflict, emotional distance, sexual intimacy issues, and lack of trust. It is important to note that every couple will fight and have differences, the issue is not to avoid conflict but to learn how to manage the conflict in a productive way. In my work and my Couples Therapy & Counseling sessions with couples I help them work towards creating connection and friendship and help them gain insight into each other’s world.
I have completed Level 1 training in Gottman Method Couples Therapy and utilize concepts from this in my work with couples. The goals of Gottman
Therapy are to disarm conflictual communication, increase intimacy and respect, and to create a heightened sense of empathy and understanding within the relationship. When a couple is not connected life can feel more challenging, everyday interactions feel negative, and conversations tend to lead to fights.
I also utilize concepts from Imago therapy in my work with couples. The overall goal in therapy is to help couples slow down, feel heard, and connect with each other again. Imago therapy concepts go hand in hand with my views as a psychodynamic therapist. Imago is Latin for “image” and refers to the “unconscious image of familiar love.” This therapy looks at the connection between the frustrations experienced in adult relationships and early childhood experiences. If you are easily upset or reactive to something that occurs in your relationship it is likely something you are sensitive to because you dealt with issues surrounding this area in your life as a child. These issues tend to arise over and over in our intimate relationships. Imago therapy believes when you can understand each other’s feelings and “childhood wounds” you can begin to heal yourself and your relationship.
If you want to learn more about Gottman and/or Imago here are some links with information: